Monday, June 29, 2009

Cornish redneck record

I Found this LP on the record stand at Battistinis.
These are the tracks you could expect to find.

19) Git your Tongue Outta My Mouth Cuz I'm Kissin ya Goodbye

18) Her Teeth Was Stained, But Her Heart Was Pure

17) How Can I Miss Ya If You Won't Go Away?

16) I Bought A Car From A Guy Who Stole My Girl, But It Don't Run, So We're Even

15) I Still Miss Ya Baby, But My Aim's Gittin' Better

14) I Wouldn't Take Her To A Dog Fight, Cuz I'm Afraid She'd Win

13) I'm So Miserable Without Ya, It's Like Havin' You Here

12) If I Can't Be Number One In Your Life, Then Number Two On You

11) If I Had Shot You When I Wanted To, I'd Be Out By Now

10) Mama Git a Hammer (There's A Fly On Papa's Head)

9) My Head Hurts, My Feet Stink, And I Don't Love You

8) My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend, And I Sure Do Miss Him

7) She Got The Ring and I Got The Finger

6) You Done Tore Out My Heart and Stomped That Sucker Flat

5) You're The Reason Our Kids Are So Ugly

4) If The Phone Don't Ring, You'll Know It's Me

3) She's Actin' Single and I'm Drinkin' Doubles

2) She's Looking Better After Every Beer

... and the number 1 Cornish song of all time. . .

1) I Haven't Gone To Bed With Any Ugly Women, But I've Sure Woke Up With A Few

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